Hawkeye Excellence ~ A Hawkeye Music Mom's Musings on Basketball

I’m a Hawkeye mom, twice over. Y’all probably know that already. Watching Hawkeye women’s basketball these last two years has got my brain spinning. And yes, I’m late to the party. We don’t even have cable TV. Still, I along with 15,000,000 others have become obsessed with following Caitlin Clark and the Iowa team. Then, yesterday, in Caitlin’s last game with Iowa, they lost the NCAA championship to South Carolina. I didn’t cry, but I could have. I didn’t cry because the other team was just so good, and the sportsmanship was so solid, and the coaching was just so inspirational on both sides. That’s the only reason.

If I had cried it would have been as a mom. My kids are college students, ages 22, and 19. I imagined what they would be feeling at that kind of loss. But my kids are musicians, which is of course completely different than basketball. They never narrowly lose competitions after giving blood, sweat and tears. Still, if I had cried I would have cried for the disappointment of those hard working athletes.

I might also have cried as the coach. I’m a coach of sorts, for a host of young musicians, which again, is completely different than basketball. Music teachers never put their heart and soul into the development of students’ talent and character only to have them suffer the ups and downs of musical life. Or even just to see them grow up and move on. If I had cried, I would have also cried to see the season end. To say goodbye.

But basketball is completely different than music.

I watched the post game press conference for Iowa. Then I watched it again and took notes.

Learning how to lose is ever so much more important than learning how to win. Caitlin said, and I paraphrase ~ the emotions would probably hit her over the next couple days, but “I don’t have much time to sit around and sulk, and I don’t think that’s what I’m about either.” Yep, give yourself some time, but then move on. Musicians never have disappointments to reconcile, no fierce audition rejections.

Please don’t take my sarcasm as negative. I’m actually really obsessed with how alike the pursuit of excellence is regardless of the arena. Let me continue.

Next Caitlin talked about how her parents never said no. Oh wait, they said no a lot, but never to basketball, never to who she could be. They never set limitations on her.

My mind wanders. Let’s sail this ship as far as it will go. What are you going to do with a music degree? It doesn’t even matter. You are pursuing excellence and excellence will provide for you. Bill and I never gave it a second thought. For either child.

Back to the press conference. The microphone was turned over to Coach Bluder. Here’s a few of her thoughts, which could have come straight from Every Child Can, the introductory Suzuki education class.

“Caitlin is a star, but there are so many stars.”

“Success breeds success.”

“Many laughed at her for coming to Iowa, but she believed.”

When asked how she coached Caitlin differently, she responded, “quite frankly I hope that I haven’t changed a lot. The values I have now are the same values I’ve always had.” That sounds a lot like character first, Dr. Suzuki’s priority of developing noble human beings. We can learn new piano techniques, but our values never change.

Bluder spoke of the challenge of the line you have to walk between establishing discipline and putting out the athlete’s internal fire. That sounds a lot like every single piano lesson I have ever taught.

I was an hour in, I had to ask my phone for extra YouTube time, but I didn’t stop there. I watched the South Carolina press conference too. Coach Dawn Staley was equally inspiring. It’s obvious that she is a highly demanding second mother to those girls. She credited the teams’ success to the development of trust. “Love is given, trust is earned.” Wait, that’s actually my quote.

I almost choked on my popcorn when the reporter asked Staley about future recruiting. She remarked that along with talent of course, the athlete’s relationship to her parents was a primary factor. If a girl respected her parents Staley could achieve anything. If the girl didn’t respect her own parents she was never gonna respect the coaches. That from the top of the top.

She also said she deals with parents everyday. Intense kids have intense parents. That goes with the job. I resemble that remark.

These are just my musings, so you are not expecting a profound paragraph to wrap this all up, are you? Well, okay, I owe it even to myself to sum this up, even if it’s obvious. Studying any students and teachers of excellence you find it’s all the same. I’m talking about my definition of excellence. Character. Community. Parenting. Trust. Belief. Culture. Love. Discipline. Fire. That’s the short list we are responsible for. I felt the weight of the responsibility of both coaches yesterday. Winner and loser. The responsibility they feel for every girl on the team ~ the star, the next star, the girl on the bench. Every athlete deserves to meet her potential. Every child deserves that.

Okay I actually did cry, just a little. I was so moved by those coaches and their love for those girls. I wanted everybody to win. But mostly Iowa. I’m a Hawkeye mom after all.

You know, excellence at Iowa doesn’t stop with basketball. I wish we had the money to put every concerto competition winner on a mural. Every lawyer. Every medical student. Every kid working his tail off in the pursuit of excellence. It’s all the same. They all deserve it. In the meantime, my heart goes out that the whole Iowa basketball team. I fell in love with every girl. Thank you for this ride, the joy, the sorrow, and these beautiful life lessons.